Saturday, 9 April 2016

LIFESTYLE| IT'S OK TO NOT HAVE YOUR SHIT TOGETHER.. RIGHT NOW

Every now and again, I like to write it's OK series. A series of life lessons I've learnt in my short 25 years of life. Similarly to my it's OK to feel lost post, I've recently been feeling like I'm on autopilot! You know what I mean? I'm certainly much happier than I was last year. I feel like the plans for FBL Bloggers is on it's way. However, being the reluctant perfectionist that I am, I've recently been asking myself and others. .what do I or you want?
IT'S OK TO NOT HAVE YOUR SHIT TOGETHER
IT'S OK TO NOT HAVE YOUR SHIT TOGETHER


Now at first glance this is an easy question. But on close examination, this question is more complicated than what I first thought. You know why? It leaves you exposed! You question everything your doing, what you want, what you don't want and even who you are! It's a bit of a loaded question now, if you think about it. A fearful one, which may reveal that you don't have your shit together as you thought. Maybe you desire more,  than what you have and you don't know how to achieve it.
So what do you do? Do you bury your feelings? Get on with the monotonous feelings of everyday life, when you know you want more? Or do you look fear in the eye and take what you want? I'm the type of person who does what scares her. I take calculated risks. I follow my instincts, feel everything and go with what I know to be right for me.
IT'S OK TO NOT HAVE YOUR SHIT TOGETHER
IT'S OK TO NOT HAVE YOUR SHIT TOGETHER
With all this being said, I was worried that I didn't have my shit together. Now hear me out, I seemingly have my shit together, I'm working on FBL Bloggers and giving back to the blogging community; Which is all great. ..but what about me? I've given a lot back to the community over the 5 years,  so others could propel and I'm happy. But as a result, my blog has taken a back seat, and it hasn't reached its potential that it could have done in the 5 years I've been blogging.
Which has made me look to other options in which I can achieve that. One of the reasons I didn't really celebrate my 5 year blog anniversary, was because I wasn't 100% happy with what I had achieved. I wanted more, and I have only achieved 60% of my blog goals.  But in hindsight I've achieved alot. .so I'll celebrate this later.


IT'S OK TO NOT HAVE YOUR SHIT TOGETHER


Let's step away from all things blogging. Blogging has changed my life and all that, I've had amazing opportunities but it's been my whole life,   which is a bit much now. In all honesty, I'm kinda bored with it. I'll never stop it, but I focus much more on my personal life, hence why you see me at select events or do select posts.
If we talk about having our shit together when it comes to personal life, I ain't got it all figured out. But I'm enjoying figuring it out. As a confident and proud girl, I was slightly affected by not being in a relationship. Let me tell you it has hit my pride to admit that. Everyone around me, is in a committed relationship or on the road to marriage.
Even though getting married isn't what I want or need right now, the affection of a significant other, truthfully is what I want. As a strong and ambitious girl, I  tend to scare dudes off. At the back of my mind, I always thought I'd be a successful woman without a family. .without someone to love me. That is one of my biggest fears. .to not have a family in the future. However, I will not compromise my timing, my beliefs and everything else to have someone prematurely to soothe a fear. My Grandpa said never follow your friends, everything you need will come to you in time. I have to trust in the old man's wisdom.
I've now placed my focus on spending time on me. Developing sound relationships with people who empower me, who are real. I'm focused on exploring my other hobbies, music production (thanks Katie), dancing , travelling, and having a happy life.


IT'S OK TO NOT HAVE YOUR SHIT TOGETHER
I don't have my shit together, I don't think I ever really will.. at times I feel lost it kinda hurts. I question everything, and wonder why things I want, haven't come to fruition as I've done all the 'right things'. However, living day by day and thinking that good things are gonna happen..makes me feel excited about the uncertainty of life. I mean how fun would it be to know how life is gonna turn out?  So if you're like me and haven't got your shit together as you'd like, firstly ask what do you want, then make it happen. It may not work out, but it'll feel hella good fulfilling something with purpose. That's the most important thing right?  Doing things that matter to you!


BAG-PRIMARK
HEELS-PRIMARK
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7 comments

  1. if a guy is scared off by your power then he doesn't deserve you - the right man is sure to come along and make the wait worth it! I'm really feeling like I don't have any of my shit together and this post has really helped me feel as though I actually don't need to. Thank you!

    Steph - http://nourishmeclean.blogspot.com

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    Replies
    1. Aww thanks Steph. I'm glad you found it helpful.

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  2. Best blog I've read in a looooong time! It really is okay not to have your shit together. Society stigmatises this vision of having 'xyz' at a certain stage in life and for our generation it really isn't happening that way. But it's OK! Just work on you and things will start slotting into place.

    Char xo || www.memoirsmusings.com

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  3. <3333 such amazing outfit!

    love the whole post

    Karolina Gespucci

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  4. One of my biggest fears is that I'll have a great career, lovely place to live, nice things...and no-one to share it with, simply because I've spent all my time working. I need to make a resolution to start living a little more as opposed to blogging and writing all the time. Great post lovely, I'm 31 and I still haven't got my shit together!

    Victoria x

    www.apartmentnumber4.com

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  5. Hello Jess! Nice to upload the photos! You have given a new face to fashion. I really like your style. This bag, shoe, dresses etc. are just a perfect combination. Looking pretty stylist! Also the photography has done well. I think you should try a 3D photo shoot, it will look even more attractive. You may try Photo Booth Rental MA for some good quality and advanced photo shoot. Keep posting.

    ReplyDelete

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